Katyayani met Maitreyi in the courtyard of a cottage situated at the farthest end of the hermitage where none but Katyayani and her son had an access. Katyayani looked at Maitreyi closely for the first time after Katyayani had returned from Videha. Time ha dleft it indlible mark on Maitreyi. Katyayani felt something giving way to a vague undefined fear.
She sat down near maitreyi, and holding her hand, stroked it gently. She was startled to find how unresponsive Maitreyi was to the touch of her hand! Katyayani sat there speechless. Her presence failed to produce any vibration of communication from Maitrreyi. Katyayani caressed Maitreyi's face and her hand came to rest on Maitreyi's cheek. The skin under Maitreyi's eyes and on the cheek had gone dry.
Katyayani said, "Let me kiss away the scars left behind by the atrocities of time."
Ther was no sign of any fervour as Maitreyi replied , "How can you, when he is the cause of my bleeding wounds?"
"He who has the right to hurt also has the right to heal too!" said Katyayani.
Maitreyi turned to look back at Katyayani and looking straight into hr eyes, challenged her : "Is it so? Would you accept it if I say that she whose duty it was always to heal, can once in he life demand her right to hurt?"
Katyayani staed at her in surprise. She stared at Maitreyi's dour face which had concealed her pain all along. Katyayani shrank away with a sense of guilt, although there was no reason for it. Trying to overcome a sense of helplessness, she made an effort to say, "He has come home to you Maitreyi; take him in!"
"Ihave long since ceased to dwell thee where he ha scome back, thinking it is his home he has come back to."
"Trust the voice, not mine, but your own. Seek him out in the depth of your being! You will find him ther, rooted in you! He had neither left nor come back; he was there with you always."
"Alas, it is late, becauee my soul no longer keeps the house where he dwelt."
"Think again, Maitreyi. This is no war; w are all pilgrims of unknown destinations."
"Then as a pilgrim, I have the freedom to choose my destination."
"And pray, what is th destination you have chosen?"
"I am not in a hurry to choose. It is not in my sight yet. Perhaps it will be a place where I may want to end my quest, choosing not to go any furthe."
Katyayani dropped Maitreyi's hand which she had been holding so long, realizing that Maitryi was not responsive to her touch or presence. Katyayani reflected on the predicament. She wsuddenly remembered Maitreyi's words : "Facing him is easier than facing myself."
Even in the midst of the gloom that had set upon Maitreyi, Katyayani was happy to findthat Maitryi had foundthe strength to face herself, and moreover, had found the language to articulate that strength.
Katyayani was about to leave Maitreyi to herself. She stood up and looked at her again before finally making up her mind to leave. Then, with a sudden unpremeditated gesture of wrath , she turned and held Maitreyi's face in her cupped palms and forced her to confront. She poured her words relentlessly into Maitreyi's ears : "Listen O woman, you do not understand what is happening to you. You have allowed the venom to vitiate every atom of your consciousness. You are not your own self. You are not even a shadow of your former self. You are willfully and perversely surrounding yourself by darkness. This is not something I had expected to find when I asked you to face yourself. For a moment I deluded myself into thinking that you have found your strength. I was wrong! Wake up O woman; Wake up to light. End this prolonged dark night. You do not know what you are doing to yourself. "
Having spoken thus, Katyayani sat at Maitreyi's feet and looking up at her beseechingly, said,"You have the right to hurt, Maitreyi. But do you know who is getting hurt? You are hurting yourself and hurting me by doing so."
Maitreyi came to hrself. She looked at Katyayani. Katyayani rested her head in Maitreyi's lap like a child seeking assurance. Maitreyi held her close and whispered, "I will try; I'll try not to hurt."
Katyayani held Maitreyi's hand gently. Both stood up, supporting each other. The sky was dark now, but peaceful.
She sat down near maitreyi, and holding her hand, stroked it gently. She was startled to find how unresponsive Maitreyi was to the touch of her hand! Katyayani sat there speechless. Her presence failed to produce any vibration of communication from Maitrreyi. Katyayani caressed Maitreyi's face and her hand came to rest on Maitreyi's cheek. The skin under Maitreyi's eyes and on the cheek had gone dry.
Katyayani said, "Let me kiss away the scars left behind by the atrocities of time."
Ther was no sign of any fervour as Maitreyi replied , "How can you, when he is the cause of my bleeding wounds?"
"He who has the right to hurt also has the right to heal too!" said Katyayani.
Maitreyi turned to look back at Katyayani and looking straight into hr eyes, challenged her : "Is it so? Would you accept it if I say that she whose duty it was always to heal, can once in he life demand her right to hurt?"
Katyayani staed at her in surprise. She stared at Maitreyi's dour face which had concealed her pain all along. Katyayani shrank away with a sense of guilt, although there was no reason for it. Trying to overcome a sense of helplessness, she made an effort to say, "He has come home to you Maitreyi; take him in!"
"Ihave long since ceased to dwell thee where he ha scome back, thinking it is his home he has come back to."
"Trust the voice, not mine, but your own. Seek him out in the depth of your being! You will find him ther, rooted in you! He had neither left nor come back; he was there with you always."
"Alas, it is late, becauee my soul no longer keeps the house where he dwelt."
"Think again, Maitreyi. This is no war; w are all pilgrims of unknown destinations."
"Then as a pilgrim, I have the freedom to choose my destination."
"And pray, what is th destination you have chosen?"
"I am not in a hurry to choose. It is not in my sight yet. Perhaps it will be a place where I may want to end my quest, choosing not to go any furthe."
Katyayani dropped Maitreyi's hand which she had been holding so long, realizing that Maitryi was not responsive to her touch or presence. Katyayani reflected on the predicament. She wsuddenly remembered Maitreyi's words : "Facing him is easier than facing myself."
Even in the midst of the gloom that had set upon Maitreyi, Katyayani was happy to findthat Maitryi had foundthe strength to face herself, and moreover, had found the language to articulate that strength.
Katyayani was about to leave Maitreyi to herself. She stood up and looked at her again before finally making up her mind to leave. Then, with a sudden unpremeditated gesture of wrath , she turned and held Maitreyi's face in her cupped palms and forced her to confront. She poured her words relentlessly into Maitreyi's ears : "Listen O woman, you do not understand what is happening to you. You have allowed the venom to vitiate every atom of your consciousness. You are not your own self. You are not even a shadow of your former self. You are willfully and perversely surrounding yourself by darkness. This is not something I had expected to find when I asked you to face yourself. For a moment I deluded myself into thinking that you have found your strength. I was wrong! Wake up O woman; Wake up to light. End this prolonged dark night. You do not know what you are doing to yourself. "
Having spoken thus, Katyayani sat at Maitreyi's feet and looking up at her beseechingly, said,"You have the right to hurt, Maitreyi. But do you know who is getting hurt? You are hurting yourself and hurting me by doing so."
Maitreyi came to hrself. She looked at Katyayani. Katyayani rested her head in Maitreyi's lap like a child seeking assurance. Maitreyi held her close and whispered, "I will try; I'll try not to hurt."
Katyayani held Maitreyi's hand gently. Both stood up, supporting each other. The sky was dark now, but peaceful.
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